1. Wendy’s desperation to have a baby has turned her and Adam’s sex life into a “military operation.” Do you think Wendy’s militant determination is justified, or is she putting an unnecessary amount of stress on her marriage?

2. In the opening chapter, after Daphne stops answering her phone, is Wendy right to show up uninvited at Daphne’s apartment? Would you do the same thing if a friend of yours were in a situation like Daphne’s?

3. Wendy is not exactly ecstatic when things start to go well in Daphne’s life. How do Daphne’s sudden successes reflect on Wendy’s self-image? If Wendy were happier, would she be happier for Daphne?

4. Do you think that the irony implied by the book’s title can be applied to all friendships?

5. Regarding Wendy’s work for Barricade, do you find her actions and obsessions to be in keeping or in conflict with the political bent of her job?

6. Daphne, in her friendship with Wendy, has always been the “beautiful one.” How does physical appearance affect the dynamic between them? Between friends in general?

7. In friendship as in love, one person may “fake it” for the sake of the other. When is it worth it to stretch or omit the truth in regard to a friend? In what ways do Daphne and Wendy cross that line?

8. The two men Daphne goes after don’t seem like obvious choices. Why do you think she’s drawn to Mitch Kroker and Jonathan Sonnenberg?

9. At first glance, Adam and Daphne seem like unlikely co-conspirators. What’s your take on their alliance?

10. Wendy has a fraught relationship with her mother, Judy. What do you think of the role her mother plays in Wendy’s life?

11. Did you relate more easily to Wendy or to Daphne? (Or both? Neither?) How so?

12. How does money (having it, wanting it, needing it) shape the novel? Do you think Wendy is justified in wanting Adam to go back to work? Would money solve their problems?

13. Wendy reads one of Shakespeare’s sonnets at Daphne’s wedding. In light of the story, what do you think of the lines “Love is not love / Which alters when it alteration finds”?

14. How do friendship “breakups” differ from romantic ones?

15. Name some of the essential differences between friendships among women and friendships among men.

16. Wendy has a fierce yet tacit antagonism with Paige Ryan. When Paige tells Wendy that Daphne’s baby belongs to Adam, should Wendy believe her without first talking to Adam? Would you have believed Paige?

17. In the hospital, when Daphne admits to having cheated on Jonathan, does she seem genuinely sorry about the choices she’s made? Should she be?

18. At the end of the novel, (mostly) everyone winds up in a place far different from where she or he started. Do you think Wendy and Daphne will be happy? Will they be happy --- at long last --- for each other?

19. What other books about friendship do you find particularly true to life? Did I’m So Happy for You remind you of any of them?